I feel someone is obliged to review the new movie, so I figured “what the hell?”

Iron Man 2 has gotten 57% on Metacritic, so I wasn’t sure what to expect from this movie. I liked the first movie for its eccentricity and awesomeness, but of course sequels are never as good as the originals. So, for anyone who doesn’t mind the spoilers, let’s roll through everything I can possibly think about about all that is Iron Man 2.

Review:

To summarize, Iron Man is about Tony Stark, a corporate executive and genius inventor turned superhero, and after the first movie everyone in-universe knows it. That universe gets jealous of Stark’s tech, but as long as no one else than the ever responsible Stark has the suit the world should be safe. Guess what happens.

Well, that doesn’t happen…

The antagonist, the son of the partner of the father of the Iron Man, goes on a revenge spree to get his copyrights, but since he invents something similar to Iron Man’s suit (arc reactor plus plasma whips) the world gets scared and pressures Stark further. Stark in the meantime is suffering from his own arc reactor which is leaking palladium into his blood (great way to die F.Y.I.) and so goes into an even more eccentric depression-rage by living carpe diem until he blows up his own house. It’s not until the accumulation of the tech wars between him and rival Justin Hammer that he gains his old self back.

You can’t really see the awesomeness from that wall of text though. The action scenes really display raw badassery as expected and thoroughly enjoyed. The writing once again was quick-paced, but this works with the personalities of the characters as well as dramatic effect (when they start to talk slowly, you know something is going down). The computer graphics were top notch (as there was one graphic artist for every 2 minutes of the movie). I mean, look at how much this scene says “technology porn.”

Perhaps the reason why the meta-ratings are so low are because the plot and plot devices were confusing. All of what Stark did, like how he randomly drove in a formula 1 race, didn’t seem to fit into the story until you remember that Tony is stressed as hell (which means do anything to cheer himself up, which the rich motherf*cker can do). Then there’s the deus ex machina of Stark finding a new element to power the suit. I’ll talk about this more later, but let’s just say a triangle’s strength does not work that way. And in the end, Iron Man does gain some levels, but nothing changes in the end - Tony gets his job and mad respect back, the bad guys are dead or arrested, Rhodes is back being his black best friend.

Well maybe not the SAME black best friend…

But seriously, this stuff pretty much falls under “willing suspension of disbelief.” The first Iron Man was just as complex as the second, and the sequel had everything the first had BECAUSE of its success. This is one of the rare instances where the sequel is just as good as the first - not worse, not better, but equally good. I’d say this film delivered and deserves 5 stars (or is the max 4, I’m not sure how that works…). Go watch it. It’s worth it.

Random Comments:

• Whiplash, the Russian revenger, looks way too Cuban to take realistically.
• Stark speaking Italian is definitely going to be a joke on the Rifftrax.
• Pepper Pots was never bitch-slapped in the movie. The Onion lied to me.
• For some reason, Don Cheadle looks really funny in his suit.
• There are at least 150% more one liners in this movie. It’s even lampshaded.
• Downey definitely tries pulling a one-liner and ends up laughing at how ridiculous it is.
• Element 118, the element Stark makes as a deus ex machina, has nothing in common with palladium on the periodic table.
• Particle accelerators DO NOT EQUAL high powered lasers! You need a loop for that to work.
• Look for Captain America, Black Widow, Nick Fury, Thor, and Stan Lee in the movie. They’re there.

Any thoughts?